MILLER & MOULTON’S BARSTOOL BANTER: Betting Against the Super Sunday Buffet Is a Losing or ‘Gaining’ Proposition

Why is it we feel compelled to eat our way through Super Bowl Sunday?

Was Thanksgiving and Christmas so long ago that we desperately need this? I mean it has been a whole five weeks since New Year’s… are we in such dire straits that we must gorge ourselves and we must do so now?

Except for Thanksgiving, more food and drink is consumed in America on Super Sunday than any other day of the year. Considering how fat we are (as a nation), that’s a WOW!

Super Sunday is also where many dreams go to die. Not just the dreams of one team but the dreams of many overweight people. They have made their New Year’s resolution to start working out and watching what they eat. For five weeks, they are focused and dedicated to the cause. Then… things go horribly wrong.

Has this scene played itself for you or a loved one? It’s Super Bowl Sunday. You have to watch but you can’t do it alone. So, you go to a party or you host one. The meal has as many courses’ as the pre-game show has hours (Minimum six). You begin by picking at the carrots and celery. Ten hours later, you’ve been drinking a bit and you’ve finished a bag of Dorito’s. In between, you’ve consumed the same amount of carbs as the entire winning offensive line during their pre-game meal. It’s the next morning where you wake up and either get back on the treadmill (so to speak) or you give up the fight for another year.

So there is an awful lot riding on Super Bowl Sunday. There’s immortality for the winning team, financial viability for many sports bars and restaurants, and a struggle of waistlines and cholesterol levels for millions of us. What’s an American to do?

That’s silly. It’s the Super Bowl. For better or worse, it says as much about America as the Fourth of July! So while you’re being a great American, make sure you bet illegally on the game too.

So eat, drink, gamble and be merry!

A nation is counting on you. Don’t let her down.